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{Mystic Self Letters} "So tell me...where do you go?"

Dear One,

Thank you so much for joining me in this process of healing and learning. What you are about to read below is a part of a series of letters to my younger self.  

This project began when I was connecting with a dear sister of mine and she asked: "What would it look like to write letters to your younger mystic self?"

That idea really struck a chord with me - to imagine my younger self receiving these letters felt like such a gift, like sweet medicine. 

And I desired to share these letters with you, my dear community, as I imagine that perhaps, a younger or current version of yourself may also wish to feel into these words.

READ THE FIRST LETTER AND FEEL INTO THE ORIGINS OF THIS PROJECT HERE

READ THE SECOND LETTER HERE

READ THE THIRD LETTER HERE

LISTEN TO THE PLAYLIST HERE


Dear Mystic 20-year-old Elle,


This is the summer that you will live with someone who will feel like a sister, like a soul mate, like a lost twin soul, with the sound of waves crashing outside your window.

This whole summer, a conversation that you had during the last days of your sophomore year will repeat in your head, over and over again.

The boy, after kissing you:  “So, tell me, where do you go, sometimes?”

You, being reminded of your body: “What do you mean?”

The boy, looking you in the eyes: “Well, your body is here, next to me, but you…*you*...you go somewhere else sometimes. I can see your body but I can’t see *you*...it’s like you’re off somewhere. Your mind or spirit flies away for a little bit.”

You, totally confused:  “Oh. Well. I’m not sure, really.”


And so, as you share American Spirit cigarettes with your friend, making art, and taking walks so that you can visit your favorite tree of all time, you will think about this. 

Do you go somewhere? Where do you go?

As this has been something you have done your whole life, without realizing it, to have someone point it out and show it to you feels raw and revolutionary at the same time.


Learning how to ground would be something that would be so extremely beneficial for you, dear mystic Elle. Perhaps close your eyes and journey to that favorite tree, and become that tree. Listen to the sound of the ocean and allow it to mimic your breath. Find child’s pose in the grass, as the sun warms your skin. Find yourself in your body, remember it throughout the day. Love it.  


Many puzzle pieces will come together this year - and expand themselves outwards to form a greater tapestry of your journey.


This summer, you will read the first half of House of Leaves, listening to Poe, and have an odd understanding of how a house could do such a thing.  The mystery of it all pulls you in to something that feels so familiar, like a dream you had once.


After you practiced yoga for the first time - a guest came to your modern dance class - it felt like a coming home. Keep practicing this, keep looking for the “more” beyond the postures that you intuitively know is there. You will find such love and devotion to the eight limbs. This is one of the ways that you will learn how to come into the body and be here, fully here and present.


Please, above all else, keep making art, taking photos, writing poems, building sacred online spaces. Hold this piece of you dear. This outpouring of expression is your soul’s medicine, a cosmic elixir for your journey.  


As you go to the library and take out books full of paintings by Raphael, poems by Margaret Atwood, and design magazines, check out the section on religion and spirituality. See what is there, see what will guide you forward.


When, in another section of the library, one of your dear teachers plants a seed of Stregheria in a conversation, follow that thread and ask her more about it. This is one of those things that you will regret not doing later on.


I know that right now you are feeling a calling to practice a spiritual connection with someone else.  What would it look like, you wonder, to sit in a circle and cultivate a shared spiritual experience? 

While you and T will dive into an intuitive exploration and games and journey into each other’s dreams this year between drawing marathons,know that it’s also okay to walk forward on this journey guided by your own passions and desires. You don’t need to wait for anyone else. You can continue forward, on your own, for a little bit, and it will be okay. You can always talk to T about what is coming up for you - she will listen, she will understand, she will believe. But also honor her own journey, and allow her to follow her own passions and spiritual quest as well.  


You two will walk to the magic shop together with C, and they will buy a Tarot deck to share, a deck that they will let you work with and play with. This will be transformative. As you explore this art and experiment with it, many things will unfold for you.  These Tarot cards are a portal for you - work with them often.


I know you feel like you are constantly beginning again, constantly “new” at something - but remember, you have been on this spiritual quest since you were small - all of these different pieces may seem so distinct, but they will all weave together, eventually.


With love,

Your Self in 2017

 

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{Mystic Self Letters} Your Individual Connection with all that is Holy

Dear One,

Thank you so much for joining me in this process of healing and learning. What you are about to read below is a part of a series of letters to my younger self.  

This project began when I was connecting with a dear sister of mine and she asked: "What would it look like to write letters to your younger mystic self?"

That idea really struck a chord with me - to imagine my younger self receiving these letters felt like such a gift, like sweet medicine. 

And I desired to share these letters with you, my dear community, as I imagine that perhaps, a younger or current version of yourself may also wish to feel into these words.

READ THE FIRST LETTER AND FEEL INTO THE ORIGINS OF THIS PROJECT HERE

READ THE SECOND LETTER HERE

LISTEN TO THE PLAYLIST HERE

 

Dear 17 year old Mystic Elle,

This is the year you rush home after school to have some quiet time to yourself, alone, as you pray the rosary, enthralled by the idea of daily mysteries, and read from the Bible. You’re committed to finishing at least the New Testament to get a feel for what this is all about.


After the laying-on of hands experience in Catechism, in the basement of your Catholic Church, of all places, something shifted within you. There were guests visiting, from another church. You knew they were going to ask you to volunteer to be the person to experience something, and when they circled around you and all of a sudden you felt like you were about to fall over, about to faint, and you weren’t sure what exactly was supposed to happen. So you asked them to stop and explain, and you discover that the fainting is what is supposed to happen...so you become even more curious. The quest that you have felt since you were small feels more important, more urgent, now more than ever.


What it really is, this quest of yours, is a thirst for anything and everything spiritual. As you work at the little shop after school and on weekends, you’ll have the luck of having space and time to explore books on energy healing, the power of plants, Indigo Children, and a wide range of spiritual traditions. On Sundays, listening to Delerium, Sarah McLachlan and Loreena McKennitt on the 5-CD changer, you would get paid time and a half to ring up a couple of customers and read these books, much to your delight.


All of this, while becoming best friends with the daughter of a Wiccan Priest and Priestess. You will hang out in her room, talking about your different spiritual experiences, and realize that to create a spell is just another way of praying, of asking the beyond for something, of setting an intention.


One thing that I must prepare you for is that while you think that it's perfectly natural to want to explore different religions and practices and faiths, that your parents will not agree with your choice to deviate from your familial religion. This will feel frustrating beyond belief - to want to explore different churches and place of worship from a whole gamut of cultures, but to be forbidden to attend. Continue to practice developing your own connection with the divine. Find the temple, the synagogue, the cathedral, the altar within yourself. Check out books from the library and dive into the delight of learning. You will come to realize that above all else, your individual connection with all that is holy will be what is most important. Soon, while you are in college, the time will come for you to have absolute freedom with your spiritual exploration. It seems so far away, but in reality this experience is so close.


I know you’re trying to figure out what you want to go to school for. I know you’re debating between becoming a youth minister, an atmospheric environmentalist, a website designer, and a teacher. It all feels so incredibly crucial, right now. Know that no matter what, you will make the right choice. Something magical happens after college graduation, where your whole fate isn’t dictated by your majors but instead by your life experiences, by your passions. Know that it’s okay not to do only one thing for the rest of your life after school. It will be okay to flow between one job to another, to eventually make your own work, to allow your passions to lead you forward. One thing that will continue to lead you forward throughout this life is your pull towards the mystery of spirituality and creativity, towards what lights you up within, towards that still and potent place of deep inner awareness.


I know that things seem really disjointed now, and like you’re being pulled in a million different directions as you continue to learn and uncover, as the scene from behind the veil continues to become more and more complex. I ask you to sit with what seems like infinite potential and possibilities and to just allow the experiences and wisdom to come forward. Please continue writing your poems about the divine, continue to find friends with whom you can share your experiences. You have always been a seeker, and as you continue to seek, you will realize that perhaps, the only real answers can be found with you. And that your answers can be different from someone else’s answers, and the two answers can co-exist at the same time. And it’s all okay.


With love,

Your Self in 2017

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Letter to my Younger Mystic Self, age 13

 

Dear One,

Thank you so much for joining me in this process of healing and learning.

READ THE FIRST LETTER AND FEEL INTO THE ORIGINS OF THIS PROJECT HERE


Dear 13-year-old mystic Elle,

Oh my love. I know that right now things feel really confusing and strange and out of place. I know that the mysteries of life are feeling especially intense. I know that you are still trying to figure out what it means to be here, in this human form, and yet somehow still so connected to some other realm. I know that you are worried about so many things - from the state of your own soul to the environment to how to present yourself in public so as not to be too different. 

You’ve been paying attention to your dreams and finding them to be more vivid. 

You’re experiencing lucidity and intuition in your dream world for the first time.  

You’ve been keeping track of the times when you knew something that you shouldn’t know.  

And you’re not sure what to make of it.

On one hand, you feel like you might have inherited this. Perhaps it runs in the blood.  

On the other hand, you feel this intense Catholic guilt and so in your nightly conversations with God you ask to be relieved from the weight of this wisdom, which feels like insight you’re not supposed to have.

My love, I know that escaping this part of yourself might feel easier than accepting it and learning about it, but if I could ask one thing of you, it would be to not pray this away and instead to hold it dear and explore it. To claim it and to continue recording it, along with your dreams, in your journal. This wisdom is a part of your nature.  

When it quiets down a bit, it will feel like you’ve lost a part of yourself, and that missing piece will feel more painful and confusing than anything at all.

One piece of solace is that, even if you do pray this away, your intuition will come forward in playful ways as you get older and navigate through high school. This playful way will feel especially safe and while grounded in mystery, it will feel okay and so familiar, a glimpse of the wholeness of your Self.  

It will feel like a game - you’ll feel it coming on and write these insights down on pieces of paper folded up in your pocket, thinking that perhaps you can show someone when your words unfold into this reality, but you never do.  

I know that sometimes you will wonder if you are making this all up. I know that sometimes, when you even *think* you are making it all up, that it ends up unfolding anyways. Take solace in the fact that one day, you will find a sense of sacred union with a dear friends, with whom you can share these intuitive nudges - and they will believe you. 

One of the best things you will do during this time is find kinship with an Amethyst and Rose Quartz, which you will oddly enough purchase from the store at Bugaboo Creek Steakhouse.  

This will be a strangely familiar experience - to close your eyes and feel into the energy of these crystals, to carry them in your pockets, to keep them on your desk as you work on homework, to tuck them under your pillow at night, to whisper to them and to allow them to whisper back to you.  

You do this in secret because you stopped talking to rocks when you were 4 years old. But it feels like this Amethyst and this Rose Quartz have so many messages for you. Continue to get to know them, to carry them with you, to allow your spirit to be calmed by them, to allow your heart to expand in their presence.

As much as you can, dear one, embrace these pieces of your self, full of the unknown and the sacred.  Ten years from now, or so, things will start to fall into place and make more sense. I know that seems like such a long time away, like eons...but it will be worth the wait.  

Stay grounded so that you remain present within this experience of life. You don’t go outside as much as you did when you were younger, but perhaps it is time to practice grounding within the mind-space. To imagine yourself a tree, with roots planted into the earth. To imagine the energy of the earth, rising up through your body, as though your legs were straws. Allow yourself to be here in this human experience.

With love, 

Your Self in 2017

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Letters to my Younger Mystic Self

Dear One,

A dear sister of mine and I were having a conversation last week around what it looked like to live as a mystic in today's society. 

I realized that while I have come to feel comfortable as a mystic today, that when I was younger I had a really difficult and confusing time navigating through being so connected to spirit and feeling so alone with that connection. 

While I have a wonderful and potent circle of loved ones who totally get me, see me, and support me now, when I was younger I didn't really know how to put my experiences in to words, and I was extremely cautious about sharing my feelings and spiritual connections with others.

And so I saw with deep clarity that I had some healing of my younger mystic self to navigate through.

As we spoke and exchanged stories, this sister asked: "What would it look like to write letters to your younger mystic self?"

That idea really struck a chord with me - to imagine my younger self receiving these letters felt like such a gift, like sweet medicine. 

And I desired to share these letters with you, my dear community, as I imagine that perhaps, a younger or current version of yourself may also wish to feel into these words.

So starting today, I'll be popping into my blog a couple of times a week to share these letters. Each letter will be written to myself at a different point in time. While these letters are personal, they are longing to be shared with others.  


Before I share my first letter with you, let's just take a moment to feel into how I define someone who is a mystic or who has mystical inclinations.

To me, a mystic is someone who lives life with one foot in this world and one foot in the spiritual realm.  

To me, a mystic sees every experience as a portal to the divine, as a mirror of the divine, as an opportunity to experience the divine within herself and to see the divine within others.  

A mystic is always on a quest for the deep inner truth that runs through all things.

A mystic feels a deep sense of awe towards the spiritual, and uses this awe as a key to unlock deep devotion towards the divine. 

A mystic loves to envelop herself in the mystery, honors her intuition, is able to develop her own set of beliefs, and is constantly re-committing herself to her intention to expand spiritually.

A mystic has gone through a shift in consciousness (or seeks the shift) to open up her third eye to the cosmic nature of all that is. She has opened her ears to the language of god and the goddess, she has opened her heart to the divine, she feels the potency and the goddess entering her nose on her inhale and exiting her mouth on her exhale. She understands that her every action is an act of worship.

As someone who had mystical inclinations at a young age, a lot of this was confusing to me, as it wasn't a part of the daily conversations that those around me were having. It wasn't something that was spoken about in school, it wasn't talked about on TV. So, much of the above definition feels to me like a mystic who has navigated through the confusion and mystery that come along with these experiences. 


Dear 5-year-old mystic Elle,

There’s a quote that you will read one day, in Roberto Calasso’s Ka, that will resonate with you in the core of your being and describe a feeling that starts to become familiar to you during this age: 

Brahma plunged into himself and sensed that melancholy that comes of understanding too much and not knowing whom to say it to. And it was precisely his awareness of that that dazzled him. That was what was missing:  someone who would understand.” 

I know one of your favorite things to do is to listen to as many Beatles cassettes as you can find on repeat in a cardboard box that you have decorated with crayons and markers, a temple to the Beatles 20 years after their last concert performance. In this place, you listen to Tomorrow Never Knows. This is your first guided meditation, and when you listen to it, something will click inside of you that you won’t know how to put into words until over a decade later. 

Lay down all thoughts, surrender to the void, 
It is shining, it is shining. 
Yet you may see the meaning of within: 
It is being, it is being
” 

And from that point on, in this temple of the Beatles, you will see their songs as an invitation to dive into meditation, and become lost in the deep presence that comes forth when you learn to dwell in a state of inner awareness. Perhaps this was the beginning of your desire to not be seen while communing with spirit, hiding in a box with your headphones on.

Around this time, you start to recognize that there is something a little bit different about you. Like one foot is here, in this world, and one foot is walking somewhere else within the cosmos. 

In kindergarten you’ll sit at a table full of girls and feel slightly out of place. The things you think about aren’t in alignment with the things they think about. Something about your mind desires to always go deeper, to read between the lines, to find the magic and the interconnectedness of everything. 

Since you are certain that your mother can read your mind (because intuition feels like something natural and a given to you) you wonder if it’s okay to even think things of this nature, to have thoughts that are, as you reflect upon them decades later, oddly observant and...adult. 

Dearest Elle, I am here to tell you that as you navigate through all of this, as you figure out what it means to be human, as you journey through the inner workings of your mind and body and heart and aura, that eventually, things will become strung together, like verses of a poem, and you will be able to be at peace with the beautiful mystery of this thing called life on earth. 

And eventually, you will find kindreds who will understand, who will circle around you and let you know that they too, have been thinking about the same things and having similar experiences.  And they will feel like home. 

As you grow, I think the best thing you can do is to be true to yourself. To stay curious, to continue to immerse yourself in unraveling the mystery and catching glimpses from behind the veil. It won’t always be easy...but to remain true to your essence will be easier than to bury it down and push it away. 

Find solace in being outside, in laying down upon the earth and allowing the sun to warm your skin. This will ground you, as you have a tendency to float away into the realm of the mind and spirit.

Do not deny yourself the pleasure of learning about all things spiritual - know that it is okay to learn about other religions and ways of connecting to the divine. This is not a bad thing - in this lifetime, this is a safe thing to explore and become fascinated by.

Be comforted by the thought that all of these interests and passions, all of these curiosities and mysteries, will continue to unfold over and over again, like a mystical never-ending cootie-catcherYou will be able to dwell in this place, where creativity and wisdom and spirit meet and intersect. 

Xo, your Self from 2017




As a mystic, one thing I learned is that I need to do business and work with others differently than what is shown and taught quite often in many of today's business courses.  

I am someone who needs to integrate the divine into my work - no matter what kind of work I am doing. When I work with someone, I crave building a relationship with them, and I desire for us to hold space for each other to learn, expand, and grow within our gifts and skills. I can't imagine diving into any type of work without exploring rituals to help lay a foundation for the tasks at hand.

If you are here, reading this...I am willing to bet that you are mystically inclined as well. And that the above sounds like a juicy way to integrate circle work into your life and business.

This is exactly what Sora Surya No teaches you how to do in her upcoming course, Sacred Circle Foundations.

If you are interested in the magic of circle, and how you can integrate the elements of circle into your work (no matter what kind of work you do), I invite you to feel into Sora's course.

If you are looking to fully step into a role of leadership and claim your power as a changemaker, Sora is the sister you are looking for to guide you forward on your journey in a way that honors all of the magic within you. 

I highly recommend this journey. I went through Sora's first round of Sacred Circle Foundations and I got so much out of it - it really shifted so much for me with how I hold space for my clients - not only my spiritual mentoring clients, but also my design clients and how I interact with my home schooling students as well.

 

My love, 
Thank you for being here, on this journey with me.
It means so much to have you here alongside me, reading these words.
xoxo, Elle

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4 Ways the Archetypes of the Tarot have Transformed my Life

Photo by Sierra Selene

Photo by Sierra Selene

Tarot has a way of creating a shift in perspective and serves as a key to unlock a cosmic gateway into wisdom that we already had within us, but this knowledge was hidden behind a veil. Our thoughts, doubts, misperceptions, and ideas that do not serve us all obscures from us from the holy and truth within ourselves. Tarot is a mirror to the soul and it reflects back to us that which we need to see.

Harnessing the wisdom of the archetypes of the Major arcana within my own spiritual journey has helped me on so many levels of my life.

That is why we are going beyond the surface level with the archetypes of the Divine Journey.

So often we sell ourselves short, don’t see our true value and worth, and are not self-righteous - these archetypes help us to create a shift and to find deep value within the way that we show up in this world.

The School isn’t a Tarot course - while we’ll explore each card as an archetype, it’s more an activation to a more confident, nourished, badass, strong, and spirited you.  

From the time I first began reading tarot, it has helped with my career - from teaching in non-traditional settings to creating art to writing to graphic design - I have worked with archetypes of the Tarot to help me to find focus, dedication, success, and navigate through obstacles with co-workers.  When I understand the full complexity of an archetype, I can see it - in both its shadow form and its light form - and truly hold space for the person embodying it. Or, I can channel a certain archetype, like Justice and Strength, to show up as a Warrior Goddess in a meeting.  I worked with these archetypes specifically when I was in a situation where I was not taken seriously in a work environment due to my age, and it was causing a conflict with a manager of mine. The archetypes of the Tarot have helped me to have SO much confidence within work and other environments.

Photo by Sierra Selene

Photo by Sierra Selene

In relationships, the Tarot archetypes have helped me to heal myself and my  heart so that I can fully show up in devotion - whether this relationship is romantic or between sisters.  For example, when I fully understood the Lovers archetype and the way in which they are devoted to each other as Shiva and Shakti, I was able to improve many facets of my marriage that felt like they were on such unstable ground. When I looked at the Lovers, I saw their deep union, their need for each other. With this archetype by my side, I saw how to find a balance between holding space and serving as a sacred container (working with the divine masculine) or being the flow of energy within a relationship (working with the divine feminine).  Even more, these archetypes have informed me about my inner sensual nature, my inner wild, my inner passion.  It has helped me to see that there is such deep sacred devotion in sex and has helped to re-shape my sexual relationship with my husband.

In addition, the tarot archetypes have helped me to meet my goals on all levels.  If you know me, you know that when I set my eyes on something, I am ALL about creating an action plan to help me make my way towards my intention and desire with clarity and confidence.  Whether that goal has to do with a design project, a writing project, the study of something or the way in which I wish to get stuff done within my business - the Chariot archetype helps me to stay focused and to harness my magic like a badass.  The tarot offers me no excuses and doesn’t let me hold back from shining in my greatness and fully showing up.  When friends ask me how I am able to get so much done with such ease, clarity, and focus, I tell them about my work with the Chariot archetype.

The Tarot has unfolded so many gifts for me within my spiritual practice.  From heightened intuition to opening the portal for the sacred.  The archetypes of the High Priestess and the Hermit are two that I call upon within my spiritual life to help me to really drop in, connect with my true essence, and navigate forward on my spiritual path.  When I look to these cards, I remember the magic within my own system.  They have guided me to contemplate how to let my light shine both within and outwards, and to come up with an action plan for how I can be of service to others as a spiritual being.  The Hermit and the High Priestess archetypes have also shown me how to play with the balance of dark and light, and recognize the benefit of connecting with my shadow in addition to the benefit of working on a cosmic level of healing.

Photo by Sierra Selene

Photo by Sierra Selene

So I teach what I do here in the School because I am SO passionate about the ways in which understanding these archetypes of the Major Arcana helps and benefits ALL areas of life.  I teach this school because it totally lights me up and illuminates my whole being to share the vast landscape that is waiting for you within each card.  

I could just teach a course on the Major Arcana and the meaning of each card...but it wouldn’t have the depth, the vastness, the full value of all of the entire energetic frequency of each card.  It would be selling the true nature of the cards short.  So instead of making this course about unraveling the surface value of each archetype, we are going to look at them through the eyes of the High Priestess and discover all of the rich and transformative energy that is waiting for us on the other side.

As someone who has been working with the tarot for over a decade, I understand these energies in a unique way.  I have been exploring my own spiritual practice since I was very young, and am bringing to this course my experience in leading meditation, understanding yogic and tantric practices, devotion to the goddess, and my passion for understanding ourselves on an energetic and cosmic level.  

As a teacher, I understand the importance of hands-on learning and experiences - so this course doesn’t involve a lot of reading, but more carefully tailored spiritual opportunities for expansion.

I am so inspired, lit-up, and curious around the way that these archetypes choose to show up.  I see them everywhere.  I see them in myself, in others. I see them in the work that I do, in my courses and in sacred texts.  They come up for me in my feelings and emotions, when I am watching TV shows, when I am listening to a song.  They permeate my existence in the most beautiful way.  

Harnessing these archetypes on the level of the High Priestess has totally changed and transformed my life.  I desire to guide you through this experience of transformation.  If the School is calling to you, I invite you to feel into www.highpriestessschool.com

If you have any questions about the School, please connect with me here

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