You may (or may not) have noticed that I haven't been writing as much. You might have chalked it up to the fact that I just released a manual on crystals, or that I am doing design work for others, or that I am enjoying the last days of summer.
& while all of those things are true, the core of the matter is this:
I just haven't been feeling well.
For the past couple of months, I've had some strange body symptoms. I didn't let this get me down at first. I figured bodies shift and change over time and this can cause funky things to go on. I went to the doctor's office I don't even know how many times this summer, and each time I was dismissed with a clean bill of health. I passed all of their tests with flying colors, so I was reassured that I shouldn't worry about anything.
Until things continued and I started searching for my symptoms in Google.
Here's a good tip: Don't use google to search for your symptoms or you will end up getting totally freaked out.
So yeah. I started to freak out. I almost fainted (literally). I did a lot of crying. A lot of processing. A lot of worrying.
I think I am one of the lucky ones, though. I think I am okay. I think that my scary symptoms are caused by Lyme Disease, which is treatable.
I am so so very lucky because my doctor is educated on Lyme Disease and gave me antibiotics.
I am especially lucky because I have a good friend who is an expert at helping people with Lyme Disease (Amy Hendrickson) working on me every day. If you know or suspect that you have Lyme Disease, I cannot recommend Amy enough. I started to feel better with Amy's guidance even before I started antibiotic treatment. Talk to her if you feel called to do so.
I am also lucky because as an energy healer, I can work on myself.
After just a couple days supported in this way, I am starting to feel better. And I am so so thankful.
I am determined to heal.
I have learned a lot this week. I started to fully live in the present moment. I started saying "yes" to opportunities that involved fun that I might have otherwise said "no" to. I danced with such vibrancy at an Arcade Fire concert that it was a spiritual experience.
I started to connect even deeper with my inner self, my inner shaman and healer. My meditations have been deep and full of soul and spirit. I feel like I have learned a little bit more about the mystery of myself. Within my heart is where my higher self dwells, and I have been listening to her with reverence. I believe that on account of this, the Intuitive Reiki Sessions I have been doing for others this week have been more powerful than usual. Funny how that works.
I am one of the lucky ones. This has been my mantra. Because in the wake of all that is going on in the world, I know this to be true.